“Complex”, I’m sure…

So, after a grueling morning in a new pair of Payless ShoeSource heels, I stopped by Walgreen’s to pick up some much needed Blister Block tape thing by Dr. Scholl’s and a measuring tape for my t’n’a. Whenever I’m in a drugstore, I like to check out the magazine rack, because I’m a total glossy addict. I look for fashion mags (Lucky is a favorite), art mags, and Scientific American and then peruse the men’s magazines (in an effort to “leave one around” so Conor will find/enjoy it).

Upon gazing through the sea of slicked and slacked that is the men’s magazine section, I came upon a very haughty-looking fellow gracing the cover of a magazine I’d never heard of: Complex.

Be still my homicidal heart as I come across the top left headline (where the eye naturally begins to read – editors know this):


Excuse me, Mom, for what I’m about to say but… WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?

Are you kidding me with this crap? “How to cheat on your girlfriend (& get away with it)”? Is this truly something that men see and are instantly grabby-hands-at?

So, immediately, I drop the piece of shit waste of gloss and head out of the store (purchasing products first, of course – I ain’t no heathen) and head back here to research this magazine.

Turns out Complex claims to be “The first buyer’s guide for men”. So, am I to understand this extremely misogynistic headline to be applying only to hookers and blow? I mean, excuse my ignorance, but what the hell does any of that have to do with acquisition of anything other than a black eye and/or herpes?

So, I’m searching and searching for this magazine’s masthead on their ever so easy-to-navigate website of all things original when it comes to men’s magazines (read: as generic as the people who read it), and I find a teeny-tiny “About Us” section at the bottom. Click.

COMPLEX MEDIA NETWORK is the premier online destination for the most influential 20-something male consumers. This discerning audience is driven by style, sports, music, games, gear and girls. The Complex Media Network reaches these style-makers and trend-spreaders through its uniquely credible and authentic viewpoint into all things Complex.

Okay, first of all, the phrase “trend spreaders” just puts the most graphic, disgusting images through my head. Secondly, this is supposed to be appealing to “influential 20-something male consumers”? Influential… to inmates? Influential… to… Chris Brown? I mean, seriously. When was the last time you picked up a Vogue and saw something like “How to screw over your relationship – and come away grinning!” or “Get double-dipped, and he’ll never know”? Or even less likely, “How to play your man like a fiddle, and keep him tuned in!” Of course you don’t. Those magazines would be deemed “for whores” or “slut-laden” because, well, women don’t think that way for one (well, respectable women don’t) and the media would have a GRAND OL’ FIESTA with it, just like every other time women are caught cheating.

Talk about a double-effing-standard. As Li’l Kim so eloquenty puts it:

if you look back in history
its a common double standared of society
they guy gets all the glory the more he can score
while the girl can do the same but yet you call her a whore
i dont understand why its okay
the guy can get away with it, the girl gets named
all my ladies come together and make a change
and start a new beginning for us, everybody sing!

They also tout themselves as “the proven voice of the people that matter – the insider’s Bible.” The voice of the people that matter? Anyone who needs to know how to fuck other women while “maintaining” a relationship, and much less finds it out while reading a $5 magazine is certainly not someone I’d consider to be an “insider”, “influential” or “people that matter”. Also, “Bible” certainly is an ironic choice of words, don’t you think?

Complex, indeed.

Perhaps the most disappointing aspect of it all? It’s affiliated with Marc Ecko Enterprises (in fact, it’s called “Marc Ecko’s Complex.com” – rather telling, I’d say). It’s not like I used to have utmost respect, or even fancied this brand in the least, but knowing that a semi-respected member of the apparel industry is behind this pile of misogynistic shit is less than pleasing.

Mmm, what a dreamboat. I hope all my Ecko-wearing boyfriends look like ex-cons.

I’m not trying to get all Bikini Kill or angry man-hater here, but seriously? I pity any girl who finds this Complex magazine sitting around her boyfriend/husband’s house, any dude who reads this pile of crap is well below the level of worth that any woman deserves.

End non-site-related rant.

Oh, be sure to visit their website. Check out their “Complex Network” to find some really great sites and brands to never support. I know I will.


Probably watching Netflix.

13 thoughts on ““Complex”, I’m sure…

  • March 21, 2009 at 6:38 pm

    Ick–this sounds like a magazine for douchebags who like to live under the delusion that they’re ballin’.

    lisa´s last blog post was Top Secret No More!

    • March 21, 2009 at 6:44 pm

      Exactly! Cheating on women = being a badass gansta, right?!

  • March 21, 2009 at 10:15 pm

    To be fair to complex, it’s a bit satirical and knows how to make fun of itself and other magazines. I really don’t have any issue with that headline. I’m sure Esquire has had worse inside of it’s pages but this was probably humorous.

    And sometimes, just sometimes, they have really good articles that I totally love:

    modelizer´s last blog post was McQueen, Puma, La Perla, Stella McCartney x Meatpacking District!

    • March 22, 2009 at 11:20 am

      Well, I’m assuming that you don’t hold issue with that headline simply because you’ve read the article it attaches itself to. If not, I’m very interested to hear, in your personal opinion, why something that degrades women publicly is acceptable to you? Honestly, not in a snarky way.

      It’s just not my scene. Maybe I’m an old hag, but I don’t laugh at stuff like that. I think it’s 150% rude as hell.

  • March 22, 2009 at 7:47 am

    OMG that is disgusting. I really hate those men’s magazines, including Maxim and FHM. So stupid. I don’t know of any men who actually read them, so I guess that’s good.

    Trace´s last blog post was Cheap Thrills – My New Flats!

  • March 22, 2009 at 9:20 am

    Well that’s it for me, no more Marc Ecko stuff! Although the only thing I’d ever bought was a handbag that fell apart WAY too fast for its original price, good thing I got it at TJ Maxx.

    It seems to be a disturbing trend lately in men’s magazines/media – there was a post on Feministing recently about an article on askmen.com called “Ten Subtle Ways to Get Her To Lose Weight”, including a picture of a model who couldn’t have been more than a size eight wearing a too-small shirt stretching at the buttons, and gems like “Serve her smaller portions – so she’ll feel embarassed when she asks for me”, “Sabotage her chair – the shame when it breaks (and er, maybe a broken tailbone? *eyeroll*) will certainly motivate her to lose weight”, and “Buy her clothes too small – when she says they don’t fit, say ‘Oh, I thought you wore a size 8? Isn’t that what you wore last summer?’ ” ARGH. Oh, I also love the implication that if she’s larger than a size eight, she’s GOT to be a lard-ass….

    Hey, what’s wrong with Bikini Kill? :P

    Michelle´s last blog post was Public Service Announcement!

    • March 22, 2009 at 11:14 am

      That is HORRENDOUS!!! I can’t believe that crap.

      NOTHING is wrong with Bikini Kill – ever! =P

  • March 23, 2009 at 7:02 pm

    Um yeah. That’s pretty F***ed up! Real men don’t cheat or treat their girlfriends like crap. I’m surprised Zooey Deschanel could associate with a magazine like this.

    • March 24, 2009 at 2:18 pm

      That’s EXACTLY what I thought! I couldn’t believe such a sweetheart would even involve herself with such smut!

  • March 24, 2009 at 10:15 am

    That is disgusting. I can’t believe that this kind of stuff gets published. It adds nothing to the society at all. I appreciate your rant!! Rant on rant on!

  • March 24, 2009 at 11:15 am

    Wow, this explains why there are so many dickwads in this world. Great find, LG!

  • March 25, 2009 at 3:32 pm

    Brilliant. ><
    Thanks so so so soooo much on posting this, Miss Elle. Definitely needed! It makes me so mad when men can get away with anything, but if if a woman slips up just once, everyone starts slamming her.
    Awful, really. I hate to see the culture poisoning everything with their sex-crazed smut. “Hey, guys! Guess what? You can pull off three girlfriends at a time without your fiancee finding out! Woohoo! In our next issue, you get to see Pam Anderson naked!”

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