Ye Ol’ Boot-Lubbin’ Scoundel Be Pillagin’ Yer Sails! Er, Sales!

Sea-farin’ jacks ne’er mind much about yer trimmin’s or yer linings… We prefer them wimmenz and shillings, ho-ho! Maybe some-a them fancy corsairs be rummagin’ through the costume racks’n’boxes in the ports, but ne’er nay a true buccaneer! I seen the trimmin’s of yer La Petite Mort – that’s my kinda lass – wenchy & nekkid! Perfect for the sweet trade life!

It be only once in a blue moon do I get lily-livered over a shinin’ pair o’ boots! Aye, me muster up a question for ye fashion lubbers…

O’er yer knee boots – they be a black spot this comin’ sea-son?

If yer me hearty, ya know that this buccaneer ain’t ne’er without his boots – or his booty! Though, the sea hasn’t been all too kind to this scallywag lately… Pockets’r full o’ dust’n’dirt! How’s a pirate supposed to survive these rough waters in a sissy ankle-dwellin’ boot? I’d black spot any pirate walkin’ these decks in a boot made for a lass! [MISSING PIRATE EXCLAMATION/SWEAR WORD]!

I been known to refer to me-self as a gentleman o’ fortune – a bit o’ class among these rats! Ye lasses may be findin’ some trouble when lookin’ fer a pair o’ fine boots ‘fore ye set out on yer next account! None o’ those heeled fineries will do… only the roughest an’ rowdiest lookin’ attire on me squadrons! Find these here pretties among my – what is them parchments with all the loot I want? Aye, WISH LIST. They be less than a dubloon er two and that’s my kinda pillage! (Fake leather is what I prefer! Not all ye pirates gotta be the same! Some of us be vegans, aye!)

O’er Yer Knees Boots!

Below or At Yer Knees Boots!

 Not Too Coy Heidi Boot: $54.99
Distressed Lace Thigh-High Boot: $45.50
Distressed Lace Thigh-High Boot: $45.50
Type Z Kirby Boot: $58 (the brown an’ taupe be cheaper!) 

Mossimo Kari Flat Boot: $34.99
Triple Buckle Knee High Boot: $45.50
Old Navy+ Faux Leather Boots: $40
Contrast Zip Riding Boot: $44.50
Wanted Black Hi-Shaft Boot: $49.99
Exposed Zip (NEON!!) Lace-Up Boot: $50


This has been a post by Pirate Guest Poster in honor of Talk Like A Pirate Day, which occurs every year on September 19.