Yeah, that’s right. Fake glasses – I approve of them. It ain’t no thang to wear some pretend specs around town if they give you a look you want – why are there so many people who hate this? I have heard more people cry out in “optical accessory appropriation” – or essentially, “people who actually have to wear glasses think that your don’t need them/fake glasses are like, really stupid.”

Well, guess what, punks:

Not Real GlassesThat’s right! I am a faker! These glasses were less than four dollars on Amazon and they are as plastic as this Nalgene bottle I’m drinking out of. I don’t wear contact lenses, these don’t affect my vision at all, and you can clearly see how not-magnified the shape of my face is through the lenses.

I have no shame. These are my favorite accessory and they look smashing with everything. I get laughed at a lot and occasionally scoffed at by a glasses-wearing person, but you’re not better than me, glasses people! You’re not! I am emulating you! I think you’re great. But we are also equal. (Except that I have way better vision than you, sorry, just sayin’.)

What are your thoughts on fake glasses?

Do you support them? Hate them? Have a collection bigger than mine? (Five.) Share in the comments! 

Probably watching Netflix.