I honestly never thought that there would be a day when I wanted to put anything other than a wedgie onto this page every Monday. That was approximately 3 minutes before I saw these shoes sitting on the Topshop site – and taking up most of it, really

 

Varsity Platform Pump from Nastygal

Platform Varsity Pumps from NastyGal, $105

They’re almost wedges, right? Almost? I mean, without one highly acute triangle, they’d be wedges… I’ve been wondering if having the wedgie be always wedges is too limiting anyway…

SO obviously, these are not for the faint of heart – both in height and design. The seaming and sole gives these a decidedly sporty look, so if you’re one of the 650,000 who are going for the whole turn-of-the-century-Pollyanna look – I’m sorry, these are probably not for you.

(Well, if you don’t take into account the fact that 5.5″ platforms will likely not be cool forever. I’m already hearing people starting to laud kitten heels?! Be still my waking nightmare.)

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Probably watching Netflix.