Typically, I am an incense person or a candle person, but there are way too many places where flaming objects are not only inadvisable, but straight up dangerous. Car, office (you don’t want to be the “too much stench” person with your desk incense), shopping mall, bed. You know, when it’s time for sleeping. Flames and sleeps don’t mix.

When I was in high school, I was under the impression that it was very, very cool to smell like recognizable objects: Oranges. Strawberries. Vanilla. Apple. Mostly food, I guess. It was cool to smell like food. This had me applying a super-sweet vanilla lotion in the morning which… oddly enough, kind of helped me wake up. Later, I’d have no friends and only the internet, where I’d learn that vanilla is actually great for helping non-morning people regain human qualities.

That lead me through lists and lists of aromatherapy applications for everything from stomach aches to sleep aids.

Some things, though, aren’t as cut & dry.

Spray The Bitch Away Aromatherapy

Spray the bitch away.

An aromatherapy spray/ perfume for when you’re irritated, pissed off, annoyed, tired, peeved, frustrated, enraged, or have an overall bad attitude!

This stuff is made to get rid of your grumpies or your jerkies, whichever you get. It’s full of lavender, geranium, clary sage, bergamot… All carefully picked to help you stop being such a pain in the ass. Frankie  & Myrrh suggest you spray the air in front of you, step in, and inhale to get the most out of their products.

Oh yes. Products.

40 Winks For You will help you sleep, Serenity Now!!! and Hippie Go Lucky will chill you out, Study Buddy will give you the mind of a ninja, and Hello Sunshine! will boost your mood. There are several other concoctions, as well as lavender satchets, Frisky Business Catnip bubbles (!), and… car spray? (Helps fend off road rage!)

Most bottles are $15 and contain 2 fl. oz. of product.

Check out Frankie & Myrrh’s Etsy store for more!

Probably watching Netflix.