Would You Wear: Slide On Sandals?

Birkenstock Mayari Sandal
Birkenstock Mayari Sandals, $89.95

Were you as confused as I was when the chosen sandals of the summer were the same ergonomic, slide-on sandals responsible for the “Ugly Shoe Phenomenon?” What once were best used as the punchline for every joke about crunchy hippies has now been spray-painted silver and slapped with a multi-hundred dollar price tag. Fashion.

The inspiration, of course, was French so it means it’s grandfathered in as The Most Fashionable Option… but I’m not sure I can wrap my head around slide-on sandals. They still have an orthopedic quality that I am not sure I consider fashionable or stylish, but it’s well documented that these barely-there sandals are some of the comfiest in the land.

Ever since the Big Bang of “ugly shoes” happened last year, just about every high fashion designer has eagerly climbed aboard The Birkenstocks Did It First Express.

Even though the shape makes me extremely nervous, the idea of wearing something that I can wear with pants or dresses and literally kick off is undeniably attractive. They’re kind of hypnotizing. Is it just me, or does it get easier to envision the longer you look at them…?

Madewell Sightsweet Slide Sandals
Madewell Sightseer Sandals, $59.50

My fear is that these trendy sandals will evolve to the point where people try to wear them with socks… which is just a line I cannot cross. I don’t like to think about a world where dressing like an old man at a spa is the height of fashion, but hey – who knows what my view on sauna-chic will be in five years?

What do you think?

Would you wear slide on sandals?

Probably watching Netflix.

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