It’s Friday, and for some reason, the world seems a little extra aggro today. Maybe it’s because I woke up feeling like whipping up a breakfast of revenge and justice, but I (unfortunately) don’t seem to have any wrong-doings on the docket to avenge. Yeah, life in the House of Multiple Personalities is going pretty well – which is good… but it kind of leaves me in a bit of a bind on days like this.
So, I’m going to involve myself in your life, as any good friend would do when they’re momentarily bored with their own existence. Hey – was that your boss that just snapped at you? That was pretty brutal. No, she totally did, trust me. Oh, and I think you just got a text from your significant other and I’m pretty sure it says they’re canceling on you tonight. Don’t check! Er, don’t check, it’ll just hurt your feelings, and you deserve to be happy.
…HEY I KNOW WHAT YOU CAN DO. Shop. With me. Right now. Yeah, that’ll get them back for… being… mean to you! They deserve to know that you went shopping with your friend Lindsay From The Internet. That’d really grill ’em! Yeah! Spend as little as possible, too – nothing grates on the nerves more than someone else getting a super good deal on something awesome. Psh, this is gonna be their worst day ever!
Under $25 and Better Than Mean People!
Ok, I am weak. I admit it. You have the best significant other in the universe and your boss was going to give you a raise before I made you second guess yourself – now you’re an unattractive candidate for the position. I’m sorry, ok? I just wanted to help… me. I just wanted to help me. Worst Internet Friend Ever.